Da Emprah Protects!!! (2)

Da Emprah Protects tells of an Inquisitor tasked with dealing with Da Emprah interviewing an occurence of the Space Morons saving some humans from a Drukhari raiding party.

Transcription
Inquisitor Toryx: "Tell me once more what happened."

Menial Davis: "Well, I already told the Arbites, and I told the Colonel, and I told the Commissar."

Inquisitor Toryx: "An Inquisitor respectfully requests that you repeat your story a fourth time, Menial Davis."

Menial Davis: "Well, it was like this. I was out in North fields gathering my tithes for the Emperor, blessed be his holy throne, and I saw this weird shimmery light up in the sky over the grox pans."

Inquisitor Toryx: "Go on."

Menial Davis: "Well, I'd never seen such a thing, so I go over to see what's going on. Didn't want anything happening to the Emperor's tithes, blessed be his holy throne."

Inquisitor Toryx: "Then what happened?"

Menial Davis: "Well, these kind of strange looking thin people came out of the shiny light. They were real tall and kind of pale. They rode on a big ship, kind of looked like a knife, and they had long, knife-looking ears too, and they carried nasty looking knives. Yeah... come to think of it, they really looked like they weren't made of nothing but knives."

Inquisitor Toryx: "What did you do?"

Menial Davis: "Well, mostly screamed my head off. I didn't see what hit me, but it hurt so bad, I wanted to peel the skin from my face just to feel something different. I think I blacked out for a spell on account of the pain. When I came to they were leanin' in all nasty and grinnin' and gigglin' themselves."

Inquisitor Toryx: "And then?"

Menial Davis: "Well, then I saw them fly overhead. You see, I'd heard of the Emperor's angles, the Space Marines. Oh, they show up when things are at their worst to save the day. Well, I saw one of their ships scream overhead and I saw them angels leap out of their ship and dive towards them knife critters."

Inquisitor Toryx: "Was there anything odd about them?"

Menial Davis: "Well, yeah. I sort of thought their ship looked awful rough. It was spewing black smoke out the back and it looked more patched up than Cousin Emmett's old mag planter, and well, the angels themselves, well I didn't think they looked much like they did on stained glass in the chapel."

Inquisitor Toryx: "Why do you say that?"

Menial Davis: "Well, first of all, the smell. The second, they were kind of hunched over and had real long arms, uh, muscle-bound. Kind of like the Carpasan Apes. And they also kind of talked funny."

Inquisitor Toryx: "What did they say to you?"

Menial Davis: "Well, the fist thing they did, was fill the air with more bullets than I've had hot meals. Them knifey fellers were real quick, but they kind of crumpled if they got hit, and then these, uh, angel fellers they start yelling: "'''WAAGH! Fer Da Emprah! Dakka Dakka Dakka Dakka!'''" and all sorts of other strange things too."

Inquisitor Toryx: "Anything else?"